Knocked Down ...

Yesterday I experienced heartache. My 4 year old nephew Caleb has Down syndrome. Its amazing how ONE chromosome can be so powerful! The way I live my life has been changed since the day Caleb was born. I am much more patient, have tons more compassion and concern for people with special needs, work delicately at educating my children and others about the importance of “Special Needs Acceptance” and in general try extremely hard to choose my words and actions wisely as I know first hand how the effect it can have on others can be extremely hurtful. You can say I follow the band wagon of others who has been touched by a child with special needs and feels that life is “Better” because of them. But like all things no matter how hard you try...life doesn’t happen without “knock down” moments.

Yesterday was one of those days. My sister Lori shared with me something that happened to her earlier this week. Caleb attends a public Pre-K program in which he is integrated into the regular classroom and has an aide that assists him during class time. Lori has been thrilled with Caleb’s progress, educational growth and the teaching staff and would without a doubt say it has been a blessing to have him attend school. It’s just the “knock down” moments that sting hard. When dropping Caleb off at school the other children where excitedly talking about one of their classmates upcoming birthday party. The sting didn’t come until Lori realized it was one of her close friends hosting the party … a friend who’s children have attended Caleb’s parties in the past … a friend who Lori had confided in about the anguish she feared of Caleb not being invited to parties and other out of school activities … a friend who unknowingly administered the first “birthday party knock down”. Caleb was not invited to the party. None of us know the reason behind Caleb not making “the list” it might have nothing to do with his differences, but as a parent with a child with special needs it hard not to assume the worst.

I’m sure there will be many more “knock down” moments for Lori … nobody ever promised raising kids would be easy nor does she have the misperception that raising a child with special needs comes without social challenges. What I do know is how hard it hit Lori’s heart and how an instant like this is another reminder to continue focusing on building awareness and acceptance. By teaching our children about “God’s Designer Genes” and taking the time to focus on children’s similarities as well as differences we can create a better future for all our children. Every child has a difference some differences are just more noticeable than others; similarities are often easy to see yet easily overlooked.

I’m sorry Lori has to endure these knock down moments but I'm not sorry Caleb has Down Syndrome. Love doesn’t count chromosomes … we love him just the way he is!!